3:07
Woke up dry and swollen. Ears are hot, swollen and flaking
Lots of night sweating and oozing.
6:13
Nausea
Racey heart
10:00p
Decided to go to bed without a shower. Dry healing. Had to apply Vaseline on neck.
2am
Sweating. Itchy. Ears smell of dirty sponge. Neck oozy. Light headache. Shoulders horribly stiff. Shirt damp. Steaming.
3am
Can't sleep
7am
Felt so weak and terrible Chad stayed home. Went back to sleep.
12:00
Woke up smelling my sweat- so disgusting. Hair crusted to my neck. Hit my arm on the corner of a cupboard and it started bleeding a
8:26
Feeling angry. Incredibly angry. My skin doesn't seem to be getting better, but rather different and spreading. I don't want to say worse, but not better. The sleepless nights are Killing me. The hot and cold is like a rollercoaster. Having trouble staying positive. No energy. Feel sick. Very hard to deal with. Chad is frustrated and stressed after taking care of the girls for 1 day.
-tinnitus seems to get worse the hotter my skin feels.
-my skin on my neck and shoulders is so tight and tender that I don't like moving my neck and find that I hold it really stiff without knowing. After t tenses up so badly, I finally stretch it and it pops dramatically every way I turn it. As I feel that relief, my skin starts to feel cold from the oozing.
I'm so angry. I'm angry that I used control cream for so long and it had steroids in it! I'm ANGRY.
I'm angry that I had to stop nursing for this. I'm angry that it's taken away so much of my life. I'm angry that I don't want my kids touching me.
PLANT PROTEIN & CLO
I braved the world. Today I washed with distilled water. It has a severe drying effect, but I it was better than oozing. I didn't apply moisturizer because I didn't want the itch. Went to the doctor and she thinks I also have candida. I got tested for EVERYTHING. Hair cut off etc. She recommended a probiotic, magnesium, GABA, and food enzymes.
My skin felt like it was improving and was extremely flakey. And dry. No moisturizer.
10:00
Before bed, stretched and the skin broke a bit prompting itching and a strong desire to get rid of the flakes. I rinsed my arms, face, chest, and neck with distilled water. My arms immediately started burning. I HAD to apply Vaseline. After applying Vaseline, my arms burned like someone had poured acid. Unending, unnerving, excruciating pain. I sat, still, trying to calm my nausea and dizziness from the pain while Chad got me ice packs. After about 10 minutes of ice, it felt better and I was able to lay down. Couldn't sleep and got up for a few hours.
3/26
GLUTAMINE (with breakfast)/CLO(4pm)/PROBIOTIC(with lunch)
9am:
Woke up and inflammation was down! Skin was terribly flakey! It made my black pants look white with all the dead skin. Actually starting to see real improvements. This is the best I've felt since quitting. Normal skin appearing! Can actually move my neck without cracking! And shoulders! Skin on face
My throat hurt and I have a zit looking bump in my right tonsil.
This is the first day in 2.5 weeks I've been able to hug my kids with abandon. It's invigorating. Feeling very hopeful! Oozing has subsided!! I rolled around and played with my babies! Kissed their faces!
10:00pm
First shower that didn't make me nausea is and dizzy from pain!!! praise god!! Lathered up with Vaseline.
1am
Couldn't sleep. Watched tv and aTe quinoa and soup. My stomach hurt in my right side. Couldn't find the pain location
6am
Leah woke up... I was sweaty, itchy, and hot.
9:30
Woke up, skin hot and irritated. Sweaty.
10:30
GLUTAMINE-3/4tsp
Quinoa/soup
1:20
Low... Ate
Uncomfortable stomach
2:00
DIGESTIVE ENSYME
6:30
Showered. Skin a little hot. Vaseline. Legs getting slightly worse. Painful.
11:30
Can't fall asleep. Up for tv. Used ice packs for hot arms, chest, neck
1:00
Finally tired enough to sleep.
2:30
Woke up to hot, itchy skin.
8:30
Woke up to sweaty, itchy, hot, burning skin. Chest is overwhelmingly hot and burning. ready to wake up without skin issues.
9:30
Ate 1/2 avocado, spinach, chicken…
Put makeup on
2:00
Ate soup and salad out
5:30
CLO
9:30
Hot shower
11:30
HORRIBLY ITCHY!!!!!!
1:30
Still itching. Totally maddening.
12:00pm
Woke up.. Thank God Chad let me sleep in.
1:30
GLUTAMINE
Cleaned ALL day. Skin dry and tight by end of day. Took shower and vaseline.
1am
Headache... Couldn't sleep.
2am
IBUPROFEN Hot and cold.. Chills
12pm
Woke up. Face swollen. Cold sore. Skin a little tight. Above lip hot and irritated.
3:30
LYSINE
5:30
PROBIOTIC
10:30
Layed down and had to stretch. Skin began oozing uncontrollably... To the point of soaking my pillow. Got up and showered .
11:30
BENTONITE CLAY
9:30
Woke up a little oozy but not as swollen as yesterday. Redness appears less. Eyes not as swollen. Skin feels warm.
10:15
CLO
10:45
Ears hot. Skin dry.
Cleaned all day and kept moving. Swelling down.
4:00
LYSINE AND GLUTAMINE
(Too much... Amonia sweat... Taking out GLUTAMINE)
3:30
LYSINE & CLO
5:30
PROBIOTIC
6:00
Shower. Wash hair in jasen's... Face pretty good. Still sandpaper dry. Vaselined.
Best day yet. My skin is repairing rapidity. I'm thinking from the LYSINE.
2:30
Couldn't sleep, got up and ate
10:00
Breakfast
12:30
CLO & LYSINE
Lunch
3:00
Felt kinda funky... Not sure if stress or something else. Palpitations. BOO.
4:15
PROBIOTIC
9:30
BENTONITE
Extremely tired. Skin feelin a little thick and tight.
1:30
CLO
3:30
1/4 MULTI
4:30
Energy peaked! No bad reaction to vits!
6:15
PROBIOTIC
7:00
FEEL HORRIBLE!!!! Disconnect, anxiety, palpitations. hot skin and sweating.
8:00
Calmed down. Die off?? Chicken?? Vitamin?? Probiotic??
3:00
Woke up hot and itchy. Ice pack and tv. Probiotic?? Meat?
4:45
Back to bed
6:00
Freezing.. Shaky... Horrible sick dreams
9:00
Eyes swollen, skin hot,
10:30
CLO
Breakfast
12:30
Feeling thick skinned, a little oozy, and my skin is a little warm to the touch. Head itchy and oozy. Trying to guzzle water.
2:50
Face dry and chapped. Not sure what caused it. Feeling quite irritable.
3:30
Empty stomach feeling with horrible BO.
8:30
Feeling a little better bit a bit itchy. Know the oozin is coming.
9:30
Skin feeling less swollen.
1:00
Scratched and OOZED. Now hot, sore, tired. SMELLS. Washed with distilled.
9:00
Dry, itchy, OOOOOOZY. Washed distilled. Hot and dry.. Itchy. I can smell ooze. So disgusting. Ears ringing. Head crusty and itchy.
9:30
Breakfast
LYSINE
12:30
My skin is so oozy and gross. I'm assuming it's rapid healing, but it is DISGUSTING. It's hard to understand why I'm chosen to go through this. It truly is hell on earth. Feeling the cold of the ooze makes my stomach clinch. My hair sticks to the ooze on my neck then I have to rip it off. My face is so dry I feel like I can't open my mouth.
Moved my neck and it feels like cuts down the back of my neck
2:20
CLO
6:45
Skin SO dry it looks like a desert. But feels less inflamed and LESS OOZING!!
11:00
Headache on right shoulder side.
2:45
Sweaty,itchy, HEADACHE with nausea.
IBUPROFEN
3:30
Took shower. Started oozing and itching
4:00
Watching TV. Skin dry. Shoulder sore and head hurt.
10:26
BM... Kind of loose
11:00
Breakfast. Skin dry and flakey.
12:50
Lunch
1:15
LYSINE
The most difficult thing about this disease is the roller coaster. You're hot then cold...you're healing rapidly then majorly set back. You feel great then feel like death. I'm 37 days in and I can only say how devastating this is on your system and family. It's hard to understand. I think the hardest to reconcile is all the unknowns. Is it TSW? Is it Candida? I never know and it's pretty upsetting to feel so helpless.. It's not old someone can do an x-ray and see the candida... Or see the TSA damage. It's a guessing game. Makes it impossible to plan ahead for anything.
When I wake up in the middle of the night, it is almost impossible to get back to sleep. Last night was exceptionally steamy and smelly. I went to change the sheets this morning and there was a pile of dead skin under my pillow. It is so disgusting.
Right now my skin feels thick and heavy on my face. It is better than it was this weekend, but it's really hard to tell of it's healing. It feels a little inflamed and hot.
I'm debating on whether or not to take more LYSINE. I feel as though it's been lending to the healing process, but I don't wanna overload my system.
I'm really not sure when this is going to be fully healed. I'm somewhat hopeful, but feeling a little exhausted today. The WORST is the OOZING. It makes me physically sick and smells so vile. The insomnia is pretty bad, too.
8:30
Started period.
Breakfast
LYSINE
10:15
CLO
10:30
Ate
10:30
BM. Loose stool... A lot
11:30
Stiff neck... A little off
1:39
BM
4:00
DIGESTIVE ENZYME
5:00
Tried to go to sleep around 10:00 and for itchy and a little oozy. This led to up and didn't until around 3 when I needed moisture. After VASELINE, I went to loving room. When I finally came to bed, I was so itchy and oozy I used ice packs to help me settle. Fell asleep for MAYBE 2 hours.
8:00
Woke up shirt nearly soaked, skin oozy flakey and weak. Not sure how I'll make it through the day. My skin looks less red and feels less "chapped" but I can't help but wonder of it's actually getting better.
9:45
CLO
Breakfast (1 1/2 chicken, 2 quinoa, 1 spin)
LYSINE
Feeling a little sad and frustrated. Like progress is slow if anything. The swelling is definitely down, but why isn't my face healing. I feel like I'm missing my kid's lives. I don't want to rub my face in Leah's... I don't want to snuggle Maddie. I'm sad about Leah's birthday. I don't want to do anything with my skin like this. It's so upsetting. I hurt. I'm embarrassed.
I'm trying to understand why I've had so much sickness in my life. The girl's births, my skin, all the healing crises I've had in my life. Impetigo in my college apartment, TSW 5 years ago and again now. It's like my body doesn't know how to work. It's so embarrassing and shameful that I'm so sickly. I hate that people see me in this way.
In trying to imagine being strong enough to have this on my skin for months and months.! It's been 38 days and I'm already losing momentum. It's hard to understand why I'm not closer to you, Lord. Why I'm not cleaving to you. I guess I just believe that you have better things to do than heal me. And I feel like I don't want to come to you when I'm down because I didn't come to you when I was up. Getting through last year wouod have been impossible without you. You carried me through the ugliness of Chad's sin and held me to a level of trust I never thought if achieve. I couldn't believe Chad didn't leave us and quite honestly, I can't believe I didn't leave him. Thank you.
Lord, please help me to cling to you. To seek you out in this extremely difficult time. Give me wisdom with what to do with my face. Help me to seek you for my children and husband. Help me to not ask why me, but why not me. Help me to find my voice in this world. Help me to find why you hand me here. Help me seek your wisdom. And Lord, I NEED SLEEP.
11:45
1 chick, 1 qunoa, 1. Spin
12:45
L-GLUTAMINE
3:30
LYSINE
1chick, 1 quinoa, 1spin
6:30
1chick, 1quinoa, 1spin
7:30
HOT shower. Really hurt, but needed to take that itch away.
11:00
Lost it. Lost it emotionally. Freaked out on Chad about his lack of spiritual support to me. Yelled, punched the couch. It's incredibly difficult to sleep when you ooze. My mind just becomes hyper vigilant. I decided to take 1/4 of a magnesium pill. I slept 4.5 and then 3.5 hour stretches. It was awesome, but woke up from the first stretch utterly stiff and with a throbbing headache. Drank water and stretched before falling asleep again.
5:00
Woke up with stuff neck and shoulders and a headache. Popped my neck EPICALLY and it oozed a little and I went back to bed. Drank a bunch of water.
8:30
Woke up feeling rested and swollen. Skin oozy when stretched. Skin feels weak and warm. It's terribly flakey and thin. I WANT THIS OFF MY FACE.
Glad I got sleep but feeling like it's still not healed. I need to get positive today.
9:30
1chick, 1spin, 1quinoa
10:00
LYSINE
11:17
Right temple keeps throbbing from the way I slept.
Skin is so gross. I want to just scrape t all off, but know it won't heal that way.
12:45
CLO
FOOD
1:00
Lips are hot and itchy on the outside. so sick of my face feeling like it's not feeling. I want to get a steroid shot SO bad. It's awful. Seriously awful and depressing to not see ANY progress.
2:45
FOOD
4:15
Feeling frustrated. Feeling like I don't even know what to do with my face. I feel like I have a mask on. I can't open my eyes. I can't turn my neck. I just started texting a TSW and am so excited to have a new friend.
7:00
FOOD
10:15
FOOD
12:00
Sleep 2.5
2:30
Woke up and the sweat was making me ooze. My skin feels like old leather. When will the dry be comfortable?
I fed Leah and she got milk on my arm. Now it's hot and irritated. Awesome. I have a kink in my shoulder from last night. Using massage pillow. I'm anxious about my sister coming over tomorrow. My skin feels better when it's dry, but looks like hell. I don't want anyone to see me when I'm so torn up.
4:30
Sleep 3
9:00
FOOD
12:15
CLO
FOOD
2:30
FOOD
LYSINE
Skin feelin warm, tight, uncomfortable, sand papery. Hell.
DIGESTIVE ENZYME
4:40
Peeling a lot... Feeling mildly funky...slight headache.... Palpitation..
5:30
Ate
6:00
Showered NOT face... Arms BURNED.
7:17
Feel good... Descent energy. Tired, but clear headed.
9:30
Tired... Skin is so dry like sand paper to the touch, but feels a little less like a dried mud mask.
12:30
Woke up a little oozy and flakey. Got up to watch TV.
9:30
Woke up and ears were liquidy, skin was stuck to robe, and LOTS of sloughed skin. Scratched a little off my face. Skin is snowing off me and leaving gross piles.
10:00
CLO
FOOD
12:30
FOOD
2:00
FOOD
2:30
Skin feels better. Not as tight. SO much shedding.
3:00
Feel an unsettling feeling in stomach. Not hunger, but a weird urgency. Not pain, very hard to describe. Die off? Now BO...?
3:16
FOOD
LYSINE
5:15
FOOD
Rubbed eyes. Felt so good, but broke a lot of skin. Washed face and got some of skin off. Put Vaseline on. Needed some kind of moisture.
8:15
FOOD
4:00
Finally going to bed. Couldn't sleep. Skin so itchy and irritated and raw and sloughing. I'm afraid to go to bed.... I don't want my skin to stick to my pillow.
Asleep by 5
7:30
Some face spots still slimy. So disgusting. Up with Leah. Shirt crusted to my chest.
9:00
FOOD
10:15
BM -a lot
Feeling a little inner vibrations in chest. Heartbeat feels a little funky,
1:30
FOOD
5:00
FOOD
I'm so tired. My skin is golden crusted and tight. I can't really close or open my eyes. Is really uncomfortable.
7:30
FOOD
10:30
Need to sleep. Crust making it so difficult to sleep.
SLEEP: 12:00-3:30 (3.5)
5:30
FOOD
3:30
Woke up wide awake. Crust us so oozy underneath. Skin so thin simply rubbing it causes ooze. This has been the worst by far.. Skin feels like a dry, cracked later over a puddle of water. You can actually push on the skin and feel liquid underneath. It's maddening. Not sure how to deal.
SLEEP: 6:30-9:30 (3)
SLEEP: 10:00-12:15 (2)
12:50
Eyes are so crusted over that I can't open or shut them properly. Everything looks slightly blurry. My eyes look like little beads. It's so gross. Meanwhile my arms are healing up pretty well. My stomach and back rash is getting more irritated. And my neck is crusted over for the moment. Scalp is oozy and crusty! Soooo. Gross. My arms are improving! The eczema on my right hand is no longer as red and is softening up. The arm rash is nearly gone and the discoloration on skin is starting to return to normal.
FOOD
4:30
FOOD
CLO
LYSINE
5:15
The golden crust is so hard to ignore. I want to peel it off!!!?
6:00
Pealed crust... Epsom bath... Crust and flake less after bath
1:00
Couldn't sleep. Too sweaty and ear started to ooze. Then neck started to feel oozy. Got up and picked at my face. Why do I pick at the skin!? Just leave it alone.
3:30
More picking.... Scratched the hell our if chin and neck which led to more licking and apple cider vinegar rub on face. Now it's so red and painful.
I just want sleep but couldn't get comfortable. So frustrating... :(
I'm feeling so sad and tired. Kind of like giving up. It's so frustrating and hard to understand. Is it improving? Do I have a gene mutation?
6:30-9:30 SLEEP (3hr)
10:20
Chad stayed home from work. :(
Woke up and neck was itchy and oozy. I put ACV/EPSOM water in it to try and dry it and am sitting in front if a fan. I am so tired. All I want to do is sleep, but the thought if putting my face and neck on something and it oozing is traumatic and upsetting. It's AWFUL. I think that's the WORST part if this. It's psychologically distressing. It's so awful. Other than my nexk, the rest of my face has flakes all ofer it. I look like I'm growing scales:
My husband is amazing. I couldn't do this without him.
4:00
CLO
LYSINE
Skin is hot and painful and oozy. It's also dry and flakey. There is no rhyme or reason for the flares. They do what they want. It's depressing and quite maddening.
Icky feeling. Amped and gross, BO. Palpitations.
10:00
MELATONIN
couldn't sleep. Drifted in and out.
11:30
MAGNESIUM
feeling alone. I don't even look human. I look like a monster.
Just want sleep.
5:00
Woke a few times but fell back asleep.
10:00
All kids up. Skin feels hot and burned. Looks terrible,
11:00
FOOD
CLO
1:30
FOOD
Skin is so hot and irritated... Sign of healing?
10:30
Put Valor on my toes. Coconut oil in face. It burned a lot when I first out it on. Had dreams.
1:30
Woke up wide awake. Picked a little and put more coconut oil on. Doesn't burn as much this time. Overall, skin looking better. Still very red but but not near as flakey. Definitely manageable. Feeling more positive. Think I'm done with moisture withdrawal for now.
5:00
Back to bed
Itch itch itch! Awake... Wash face. Then off humidifier. Face is hit and throbbing and somewhat cold from ooze.
6;00
Still awake
MAGNESIUM (200)
9:45
Terrible dream sleep. Cold and sweaty all night. VERY sweaty and couldn't get deep sleep. Face felt gross. Humidifier made skin loose and flimsy.
10:15
FOOD
2:30
FOOD
CLO
3:00
Empty heart feeling... Can't catch breath. Skipped heart beats. Irregular heart beat. BO. Tears. Cold feet. Anxiety. Warm feeling down arms.
4:00
Hottest shower I could stand. Skin hot but DRY which is better than oozy and soft. Coconut oil is a no. Heart and body better. Took 2 sips of coconut water.
4:30
Major anxiety. Maybe not eating enough. So tired. NEED sleep.
8:15
I'm relaxing. I'm so tired. I'm anxious about getting sleep.
10:30
SLEEP 3 hrs
1:30
Up, tossed and turned
2:30
SLEEP 2hrs
4:30
Up.. Tossed and turned
5:30
SLEEP 2hrs
8:00
SLEEP 1hr
9:30
Shower. Sandpaper skin in arms and chest. Face so tight I have no mobility. Put Vaseline in arms, chest, and neck.
10:15
FOOD
5:30
LYSINE
8:45
Scratched cheek over shirt and scratched huge holes in my cheeks. I had to take a hot shower to stop the itch. The welts BURNED.
11:00
MELATONIN
Couldn't sleep from nasty oozing
1:30
So depressed and awake. The holes would not stop oozing. So repulsive. Chad rubbed my bsck til I fell asleep.
6;30
Woke up. Forehead skin with Vaseline felt thick and gross.
9:30
Awake
1:30
Low blood sugar a few sips of coconut water.
5:00
LYSINE
10:30
Forehead feels so burned. When I wrinkle it it feels so painful. Feels like I have a thick muddy half dried mud - mask on
11:00
MELATONIN
11:30
Scratched chin through shirt. Felt amazing. Skin majorly oozed in spots, but peeling away skin felt good. Skin came off and was oozy. Better than last night. Got up to dry it off.
1:50
Still up. Skin feels ok, but I know it'll ooze once I lay down. Blah
2:30
Slept 4 hours
6:30
Slept 2 hours
8:30
Slept 2 hours
11:50p
MELATONIN
1:30
Woke up. Ear swollen and oozing. Chin itches from ooze. Skin shredding off. Had to get up and shower. It burned. I got out and cried. The constant pain is pretty hard to deal with. The cycle of tight dry and oozy wet is so disturbing. Very itchy. All over. Melatonin?? Face skin feels like hot ooze under tissue skin. It feels so irritated and gross.
8:15
Still awake. Feeling better, but I'm still radiating heat around my neck. It's so hot.
9:30
SLEEP 2.5 hours
12:46
Feel like I got hit by a train.
4:00
Showered and put on SHEA BUTTER. It made my skin so creamy and soft. Overall I think it's adding to the healing!
10:30
Had to pop my neck. HAD to and it tore my skin on my chin. It's getting better, but still pretty annoying. Had to shower.
11:30
BENEDRYL IBUPROFEN
Woke up several times through the night, but went back to sleep.
9:15
Woke up and my face was stuck to my robe. Really ready for that to be over.
Showered. Face not nearly as dry as it was! No moisturizer! Skin still flakey, but it's MUUUCH stronger!!
11:00
BENEDRYL
1:00
Scratched!? Showered
BENEDRYL
5:00
Could not fall asleep. Skin dry and afraid of ooze.
8:30
Woke up
4:00
Showered
Skin extremely dry. Neck skin is so fragile and painful.
10:30
BENEDRYL
5:00
LYSINE
10:30
Shower
BENEDRYL
4:00
Woke up itchy and sweaty
Fed Leah
Couldn't go back to sleep.
9:00
Flare started. VERY itchy. Showered. Oozed. Swollen. Uncomfortable.
5/13 DAY 73
4:00
Finally fell asleep.
7:15
For the past few nights my face and neck have gotten so hot in my sleep that I wake up after a few hours. Sweaty, itchy, irritated. This morning my eyes was swollen and crusted shut from the cut above it. Overall, I'm feeling better than I was. I'm feeling like the overall condition of my skin is improving. I have mobility back. But still feel inflamed and irritated.
11:00
Woke up and my mouth was dry and I had a headache. I slept way better with a towel wrapped around my neck. But it makes my neck stuff.
All day, after eating, I felt toxic. I'm not sure if this is because my body isn't breaking stuff down properly (digestive enzymes?) or if maybe my body is killing candida (die off?) or if I have leaky gut? I really don't know. My sweat smells like ammonia as well and my body odor is rancid. Maybe I'm not eating enough?
Overall there's been an Improvement. The ooze is less. The flares are less intense. I have mobility back in my neck and face. Still feels like a layer, bit that layer isn't as stiff or as thick.
My goal for tomorrow is to drink more water. I'm not sure if I'm even ready to take supplements again either.
5/14 DAY 74
1:00am
Finally fell asleep.
4:30am
Woke up itching. Not too bad, but had to get up and wet my neck and face. Then fed Leah. Just took a BENADRYL.
6:00am
FINALLY fell asleep.
Slow moving today.
4:00pm
The hot sweating started. Not sure of it's related to food. I got really hot and started sweating. Of course it smelled horrible. Not sure why this happens. I guess it's getting better, but I can't tell.
6:30
Low energy. Went outside and it felt AMAZING.
5/15 DAY 75
1:30
Too hot to sleep. Kinda itchy. Leah woke up.
Today was great! LOTS of energy! Went outside. Amazing. Skin still MEH, but best it's been in weeeeks.
Fell asleep at midnight and woke to at 3 and then 6
5/16 DAY 76
7:30
Up with Leah
10:30
Skin felt inflamed and so irritated. Felt low. Ate protein shake.
9:00
Started having palpitations. Read it was the coconut oil, will check that out.
Felt awful. Pooped a lot today.
5/17 DAY 77
5am
Finally fell asleep.
12:00
Woke up. Swollen eyes. Face less swollen than yesterday.
Ate.
30 minutes later had BO. WHAT is the connection??
2:30
BO calmed... System calmed... Feel tired with tense shoulders and head.
Overall my skin has calmed a little.
5pm
FOOD: salmon, kale, quinoa, pine nuts....
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